20 Defining MOMents of Motherhood...

    Becoming a mother is no doubt one of the most amazing and most profound moments of a woman's life. But what about all of the other unforgettable MOMents of motherhood?  
    Like that MOMent when...
  1.  ...you get your baby home from the hospital and realize, you have no clue what you are doing.
  2. ...you realize breastfeeding is anything but, "Plug and Chug"
  3. ...you realize you can survive off of zero sleep for six months straight.
  4. ...you are standing in the store and realize you have spit up all over you, and didn't even bother looking in the mirror before you left the house.
  5. ...you find yourself in the shower at 4am because you have just been, pooped, puked and peed on simultaneously during a "routine" diaper change.
  6. ...thanks to your lack of sleep and inability to get out in the sun, your dark circles and pasty skin have caused you to be mistaken for the beginning of the Zombie Apocalypse.
  7. ...you try to summon the devil in the wee hours of morning to trade your soul to get your baby to sleep for just 30 more minutes. 
  8. ...you can smell the shit filled diaper from across the playground, and have no doubt it belongs to your child.
  9. ...you start off getting the free cookie in the grocery store just to buy enough time to get through without a screaming child.
  10. ...you learn a quiet toddler is VERY dangerous. 
  11. ...you realize all of your make-up has been used to color on the wall and carpet. 
  12. ...you realize there is a sensor in your couch that alerts your spouse and child you have sat down.
  13. ...you just start peeing with the bathroom door open, since it's not like you can go in peace anyway.
  14. ...you realize your child just said "Shit", because so did you.
  15. ...you realize your phone is in the toilet, because all you wanted was three minutes of peace and quiet when you handed it over to play games on. 
  16. ...you realize you have a better chance of winning the lottery than cleaning the house  with a toddler around.
  17. ...you stop caring what other people think, and raise your child like a BOSS!
  18. ...you think you are going to lose your shit if your child does not stop throwing food, screaming in your face, sleeping in 3 hour bursts, unloading your side table drawers, messing your shoes up, climbing on the coffee table and refusing to take a nap... ALL BEFORE NOON... but some how don't... DEFINING!
  19. ...you realize no matter how annoying, loud, difficult and down right naughty your child can be, that little bugger is still so freaking bad ass.
  20. That MOMent you realize being a mother is the best damn thing that has ever happened to you....

What are your favorite MOMents?

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Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com


Mrs. Loquacious said...

I was gonna write a blog post titled, "There's peanut butter on my toothpaste." Not a defining moment, just a typical one. ;)

Phoebe said...

my biggest fear ever was getting a lumbar puncture so my top defining MOMent would have to be when my newborn had to get a lumbar puncture and i realized that i would do ANYTHING to be able to trade places with him so he wouldn't have to go through it

Unknown said...

Yes! That's what I'm talking about... and yeah- we fought over an eyeliner pencil yesterday as well ;)

Janet Dubac said...

I love all 20 of 'em, but especially this one, "That moment you stop caring what other people think, and raise your child like a BOSS!" Oh, what a liberating feeling that was realizing that there was no one else more capable of raising my child than me!

Marianne said...

When they BEG you not to make a big deal out of their latest recital/baseball game/spelling bee only to scan the audience desperately to find you. LOVED your list!

Cindy said...

Your list made me laugh out loud! My MOMent was calling the Weather Office recorded message several times a day, just to hear another adult voice.

Emma said...

You just made my night! I'm always so tired that sometimes I forget that we're all suffering with our little buggers in some shape or form. But there's no doubt that they're fabulous!

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

Love it! nothing is off limits or too bizarre when a toddler is involved.

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

That is by far the worst realization as a mother, not being able to save your baby from pain. sorry :(

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

You know, I know for a fact they never grow out of wanting to play with mommy's stuff... I know this because I still play with y mommy's make-up and jewelry. oh and shoes too!

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

It really is liberating. I actually felt the big fat know-it-all mom comments climb off my back when I stopped caring.

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

I cannot wait for that moment! xx

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

You just made me Laugh out loud! what an awesome idea. I do remember those days, desperate for adult talk. In fact I was so desperate, I started watching Dr. Phil! now that's desperate.

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

YAY!! I know that feeling. I go to Facebook and beg my friends to validate my feelings.

Charlie Hendricks said...

Backing the brand new car out of the garage with a 18 month and 4 year old in the car. Hit the garage door and broke the side mirror clear off. Let out a very loud F^CK! Husband comes home and 4 year old asks "what does F^ck mean?". Dad says its what mommies say when they break the new car.

Unknown said...

I think it's the best and worst thing all rolled into one. I love every second of it but sometimes its just too overwhelming. Thanks for hooking up ot the Hump Day Hook Up

Dana @ Kiss my List said...

Great list! One of my favorite MOMents is when one of my kids says something really witty and I think "They get that from me :)"

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