May 12, 2013

Happy. Mother's. Day... Epic Fails!

As I began to write this post my eyes filled with tears.  I was so overwhelmed with joy over the fact that I am the mother of the most amazing and beautiful little blessing.  I instantly had this dialog come to mind where I was going to carry on about how blessed and lucky I was to have Oliver, and you all too.  After all, if it were not for Ollie, I would not have this blog and all of you to share the ups and downs of motherhood with.

My rolling dialog had me going down the path where I break down with tears of joy over just how much of a blessing motherhood has been to my life. Then, I stopped that dialogue. I don't want to write that post. I'm not in the mood to cry or be over the top sappy... BORING!

I've decided instead to find some humor in all of this Mother's Day business.  I mean, surely we all will be opening sweet  loving cards today, so why not flip the script and have a laugh?

Mother's Day Epic Fails!  

Every year for my birthday I create these unrealistic dreams that I know deep down are nuts, but still pray for a that miracle anyway.  So during my birthday a few days ago, I kept hoping for the big miracle to come a knocking. Seriously,  I had these crazy expectations that my day would be incredibly magical. Which in all honesty it was, but still, Penguin did not call to tell me they wanted to publish my What to Really Expect when you are Expecting book. BASTARDS! Didn't they know it was my birthday?!

So now with Mother's Day, I started to dream up new magical scenarios. (Whaaaaat? A girls gotta dream!) I started dreaming of things like being queen for a day where I only do what I want... I am a mother how freaking unrealistic is that?  Not to mention, I have a mother I need to spoil, so 100% selfishness is out.

This is where the Mother's Day Epic Fails come in.  Surely I am not the only mother or child to stuff up mother's day with crazy expectations or failed attempts at gifting.  To prove my point, I hit the Internet.  My friends, I was right, there are copious amounts of documented Mother's Day Fails and jokes out there.

Here are a few of my favorites...

Happy Mother's Day my friends, I hope you have an amazing day fit for a queen.  

P.s. Remind everyone of this...

Please throw me a Mother's Day vote by clicking the image below.
One Quick Click=One Vote For us!


Shay Grant said...

Lol amen to those! Mothers day here has been so lovely... until I had to clear everything up from dinner, clean up the kitchen, untie the dog and fix his chain(he had got himself tangled around the half finished fence that hubby was *supposed* to finish today), empty the dishwasher and pick up my sons toys - WHILE said hubby lay on the couch channel surfing. I am now well and truly back on planet earth, humpfh.

Kristy J said...

I LOVED this post!! Mother's Day has been pretty fantastic so far. I've even arranged for us to have take out for dinner so I can start Monday morning with minimal dishes to worry about. I hope your Mother's Day is cruising right along and kicking ass!! Thanks for the post, especially "Say it with flowers" that one was my favorite :-)

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My husband and I are clueless first time parents. We are far from childhood development professionals. We cannot and will not be held responsible if you take us seriously, especially because we don't even take ourselves seriously.

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