I used to be the perfect mom. My kid was always well
behaved, ate all the right foods, had impeccable manners, stayed close, went to
sleep on time without a fight, cleaned up his toys and NEVER acted like a
butthead, and I of course, always left the house put together. Then, I had
my first child...
It all started when I was in my twenties, and my
girlfriends started having children. Those girls... I felt bad for them. Their
kids were always causing trouble, the center of attention, misbehaving while we
tried to shop, wrecked restaurants while we tried to lunch, ruined our plans by
having constant colds... Lucky for me, I was so sure I knew how to be a super
mom, so I knew I would NEVER be,
"THAT mom with THAT kid."
Clearly, ignorance is bliss, because what a fool I was. I am
totally THAT mom, and my kid is totally THAT kid!
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| Credit: NickMom |
I realize now, back in my days of childless
ignorance, I had NO CLUE what children were actually like. I had no clue that
babies could ONLY communicate through crying. I never imagined that toddlers
were actually little humans that needed to constantly test the world in order
for it to make sense. I never imagined that five and six-year-olds were so sure
they had life all figured out, thanks to the toddler testing phase, they would
need to constantly show and tell their wealth of knowledge. I was all wrong
about my belief that kids were little programmable robots that did, said and
ate, exactly as they were told. Most of all, I had NO clue that parenting would
be so hard, take so much patience and be so life changing.
I was so sure I would be this perfect, calm,
polished mother, with a perfect, calm, polished child. HA! I am no different
than the mothers I used to judge. I have a "lively" kid, I go
everywhere in Yoga pants and flip-flops, I yell at my kid in the store, I bribe
him to be good with cookies, I clean up after him on a daily basis, I feed him
pasta and hotdogs four meals in a row, I sometimes don't change him the minute
he craps his diaper in the store, and rarely do we leave the house on time,
with everything we need. And that's OK!
The only true crime in all of this, was me being a
judgmental ass. Parenting is HARD! Super duper hard. And I expect
being a child in a world full of mystery, limitations, rules and requirements
to eat vegetables over candy, is super hard too!
Today, I am proud to be THAT mom, because it
means I am a true mom. A mom who is not afraid to do what it takes to have a
happy, thriving, well-behaved child; even if that means taking unconventional
roads to get there. I am THAT mom who has a messy house and car, cancels
plans over fevers, lets my kid push the cart in the grocery, listens to toddler
radio in the car, loves playdates, can change a diaper while my kid stands up
in the backseat of the car, chases after my kid yelling, COME BACK HERE, OR... regardless of the venue, and sometimes lets my
kid wear two different shoes out of the house, even if one is a slipper and the
other is a shoe he has outgrown, but still loves. Oh yes, I am totally THAT
mom and absolutely love it, because there is no one else in the world I would
rather be.
