Dear 'F' Word...

My dearest F word,

I miss you.

Do you miss me?

I knew that we would probably grow apart with the birth of my son, but I had no idea how much I would miss you. I miss the good times we had together.

Remember when I could make a complete sentence using just you?

You played the parts of pronoun, noun, verb and adjective so well. You made me feel so much better when I accidentally stubbed a toe or burned myself cooking. You always comforted me when no other word could.

Oh, and do you remember how much better you would make me feel when I would get off the phone with my mom?  Nothing brought me more relief than you.  Oh my darling F-Word, I miss you so.

I miss the good ol' days of F' You's, F' Me's,  just plain F's and of course the you gotta be F'ing kidding me's!

I just don't get it.  It's like one day you left my mouth and fudge came in and took your place. Sometimes I try so hard to say your name but instead frig or fudge comes out. Sometimes, as you know,  when I get mad enough that I do yell your name no sound comes out. It's so weird! It's like I have swallowed some awful self censorship pill.

I also want you to know that I am so sorry you have gotten such a bad wrap as a word. It is hard to understand how you have been banned from social settings when it is clear that you bring so much emotional relief in times of annoyance, pain, frustration and passion. I know it goes without saying that you are by far my favorite word, and will be missed dearly over the next couple of decades while I try to be a good mother and role model.

Until we can openly be together again, remember that I love you and will never be able to fully stop yelling your name in moments of frustration, pain and passion.  (Even if sound does not come out, I will still feel your healing properties in my heart.)

Love always,


P.s. If you see the S' word please let him know shucks is not a suitable substitute for him and one day we will be back together too.

For fucks sake, please click on the fucking image below to throw a fucking vote our way.
Have a great fucking Friday! 

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit