I admit, when I first heard the theory a few years ago, I looked into it. I never believed it, or really wanted to believe it, but just be sure I had nothing to worry about, I looked into it. It took me about ten minutes to decide that I was not going to go out and run up my credit cards. To those who believe it, I sincerely hope you are wrong...
Now all that being said, this whole Apocalypse thing coupled with the horrific Sandy Hook school shooting and an email from one of my best friends yesterday talking about the senseless loss of a fellow officer, does have me questioning my life and how I am living it. I am so over run with worry and fear about the future of my life, Ollie's life, paying bills... the list goes on, and on. Plain and simple, I am not living in the moment. I am living (worrying) for the next moment. Which is just a huge waste of my life and blessings.
I have my health, my beautiful son, a husband who loves me unconditionally, a fabulous group of friends and a roof over my head. Yet, I am not happy. I am a spoiled, selfish, brat with entitlement issues. I'm not even sure if I have ever truly been satisfied. I think about the loved ones I have lost in my life and how much I wish for just one more moment with them, yet the loved ones I still have I waste moments with them all of the time. So much for learning from my mistakes.
Well, I have to stop. I have to change my wicked ways before it's too late. I am so lucky to have what have right now. I need to enjoy it now. I need to embrace my son, husband and my health. I need to be thankful for all of my blessings. I have got to fix my priorities. I don't want to pass on my anxiety and entitlement issues to my son. I have everything I need. Everything.
Thank God I have been given today to embrace my family and friends and blessings. Apocalypse or not, tomorrow is not promised. But today, with the right mindset can be very promising...
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