- Crap in their pants and scream until someone wipes their ass. And that's ok!
- Put their foot in their mouth and be praised for it.
- Pee on your foot and make you feel like it was somehow your fault.
- Throw food at you as an acceptable way to convey the message that your food sucks.
- Smash you in the face, repeatedly, as a way to let you know how excited they are.
- Pull on your hair until your eyes fill with tears, and not get in trouble for it.
- Scream and cry to get what they want. And the louder they cry, the faster they get it.
- Take off their sock seconds after having them put on... over and over and over again.
- Party all night and sleep all day, but still make sure you are up the full 24.
- Make you go broke and feel SO damn good about it!
And now for FTD's list....
- Vomit in your mouth, puke in your hair
- Flirt with multiple ladies in the supermarket
- Tie up the TV watching 8 hours of Teletubbies when the football finals are on
- Pull the cats' tail out of its socket
- Smash up daddy's new Lego Star Wars Millennium Falcon
- Have a leaky shitty nappy on daddy's side of the bed (Oh my Gosh, too funny, this did happen! FTD yells out, "Why is there a shit streak all down my side of the bed?!" Oliver naped there and had a small leak... I totally missed it! funny.
- Rip the dvd player off the shelf and smash it on the floor
- Play with the penis without going blind
- Punch mummy in the teat without getting an AVO (anger violence order)
- Slap nanna SOOOO hard that her spectacles hang off her ears
And last but not least..
Get away with anything with a sweet smile and a quick mumble of "mama" or "dada."
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