8-Month old baby observations

I don't even know what to say. Am I really 8-months postpartum, and my little baby 8-months old?  Didn't I just write about him being 7-months old yesterday? 

It's all going too fast. I say it every time, and judging by the old women who accost me in the grocery to tell me, "Cherish this time because it goes too fast,"  I will continue to say this every time. Forever. I just cannot believe it has been 8-months since I was pregnant.  Too fast...

The list...


1. I am still tired. Dog ass, I want to punch strangers in the face for fun, tired.
2. I am bored with my life.  I want to run around like I used to. I know this must sound selfish, but it's true. I miss the freedom.  8-months and I have not had more than two drinks, gone out with my girlfriends for a late night, or gone on even the shortest of weekend holidays. I feel like a caged animal.  I also feel bad now for saying this b/c I love my baby so much, and would not trade him for a Hangover style night in Vegas... Not that I wouldn't love one... 
3. I am still breastfeeding exclusively.  What this really means is, I am still carrying around these huge things on my chest that leave a trail of liquid wherever I go like Hansel and fu*king Gretel. I still have to watch what I eat and avoid Caffeine.  It's not awesome. However, this is just for a year of my life. It is worth it... Only 4 months to go!!
4. I am down to my last 10 pounds of excess baby weight to loose! I wore my pre-pregnancy jeans last weekend! They fit even better after I dropped the tear of satisfaction! Yay me!
5. I am such a different person, with different priorities. I feel like I have matured 8-years in 8-months.
6. I have a new level of patience. I can put up with anything. Well except the hair pulling. Oliver yanks on my hair so hard sometimes I want to bite him. Seriously, bite him.
7. I live on a tight budget now. Before Oliver I pissed away money. Now I am so afraid of not having enough to feed him, diaper him or even have a roof over his head. I save and pinch pennies.  I kind of hate this about my new motherly ways.
8. I am now a Been-there-done-that mom.  I look at moms with newborns and smile fondly, remembering the good ol' days.  WTF is that?  I'm still a new mother!! How can I feel like an old mother already when I look at babies just months younger than mine?!
9. I hate to admit this, but so much time has passed since being a big fat constipated, gassy beached whale of a bitch, that I look back on pregnancy fondly now... Ok, "fondly" was the wrong word... I look back on it with a wicked case of amnesia because I think now it was not really that bad... Ok, "that bad"  was the wrong phrase... Oh screw it. Pregnancy sucked, but I forget how much since it has been so long. And thanks th the amnesia, I would totally do it again for another Oliver.  
10.  I have the capacity to love like I have never known how to love before. I love being a mother so very very much, even more today than yesterday, even in the haze of no sleep, and even when I am dreaming of a Hangover style night in Vegas with my unmarried friends. 


1. WOW!  What a big fat baby boy.  He is wearing clothes for 12-month olds.  His feet are so big they don't fit in Carter's Footy PJ's. His hands look like they belong on a 3 year old.  
2. He is a human wrecking ball.  Now that Ollie is mobile he crashes into everything in his way. He pulls himself up on anything that will hold him, and things that will not.  He is constantly up to no good.
3. The word "No" means "Go" to him.  We have tried every discouraging word and phrase to keep him from power cords and cat food.  Nothing works.  
4. He has figured out that screaming, fussing and whining will get him attention.  I am trying not to respond as much, but he knows as long as he keeps it up and gets progressively louder someone will come running.
5. The child has a death grip. I have to make sure I do not push Oliver within arms reach of anything when out shopping.  If he grabs hold and I take it away, he makes such a huge scene you would think I was trying to kill or kidnap him.
6. Now that he can drink from a straw, not only is my drink no longer safe, no one else within arms reach is safe either.  He will grab at strangers in line.
7. We are beginning the transition from baby purees to baby meals.  He has never been fond of mush.  He still only eats lunch and dinner.  Not a huge fan of food in general.  Just nursing for him is fine.
8. His only word is mama so far.  He is trying out all kinds of sounds, tones and pitches.  I LOVE hearing his little voice. I hate hearing him scream for fun.
9. He still is not sleeping longer than 6 hour stretches.  I am close to sleep training. I am just not sure I have it in me yet. Clearly, I have not reached my breaking point.
10.  Oliver is awesome.  I am so lucky.  If I was not a selfish human I would not have any complaints.  He is a wonderful blessing.  I love watching him grow and become a little boy.

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com


Unknown said...

Sigh... I know, right? This time goes by waaayyy too fast! Strangely, I found 7 months a much more bittersweet milestone than 6 months, I think because it means we're on the downhill slide now to 1.
Yay for the pre-baby jeans, nay to hair pulling and straw hogging (we have finger gnawing and cup hogging), and a big WTF to amnesia. Seriously, already?!
A friend of mine had her 2nd a couple weeks ago, when I went to see her the week, before she had her baby, she hit me up with a "What. The. Hell. WHY DID YOU LET ME DO THIS AGAIN???" Honestly, find a friend in a similar situation, they will refresh your memory. OR, watch One Born Every Minute. I swear I felt contractions and morning sickness all over again watching that show. And if all else fails... looking forward to your new blogs... Tired of Being Pregnant AGAIN, and 1st & 2nd time mom & dad. ;-)

Kitten said...

HA! Grabbing. P and I are learning this again, but as steady restaurant goers (we go at least once a week because we are LAZY) we forgot that when N got to this age, we had to clear the half of the table closest to him.

Mrs. Loquacious said...

Good for you re:pre-baby jeans! And cannot believe your lil man is 8 months!!

Hear ya on hair-pulling and death grips. Baby L is a little grabbing machine and also stupidly strong (can open drawers!). My hair is forever in an ugly-ass ponytail now. I also try to avoid wearing laces and things that dangle.

that suburban momma said...

Awww, time does fly way too fast! Seems like just yesterday my Princess was 8 months, now she's 7!! It really is crazy how much you change after having a child. Gone are the days of shopping sprees for us. Now it's all about them! Hopefully the sleep schedule will get better soon... You both are doing an awesome job! He's such a cutie!!

Unknown said...

ACK! He's so freaking adorable! and may I say I'm jealous that he can wear sweaters right now??? My sister read this first (while I was running around trying to get Kaely ready for school and hadn't had a chance to yet) and she was sitting here sniffing with tears in her eyes... It's so insane how much these bugs change our lives! I will also say that amnesia has NOT kicked in for me, and I doubt it ever will- poor Chase (haha) will have to suffer with being the baby forever, because I still think his pregnancy was the worst thing I've ever gone through. That being said, he is the MOST amazing creature ever- only sharing that sacred spot with his big sister.

As far as selfishness goes- I say we all meet somewhere in the middle for a girl's weekend- bring the dad's out and let them compare wankers for a couple hours while us ladies enjoy having two hands again :) hehehe... one can dream :)

Enjoy every moment lady!

Kelly Steele said...

You will drop the last few lbs without even trying once you're done breastfeeding I bet. That's what I did, and I've heard other women as well! PS - My second is 4 months today I can't believe it!!

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

No worries... I will not be having a sibling for Ollie anytime soon. But thanks to the amnesia I am not completely dreading it.

And bet your ass there will be some blogging going on. ; )

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

LOL! If it is within reach it is Ollies. Property laws are already beiing set forth. But, thanks for the restaurant reminder. We have not gone there yet.

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

Oh yes, the ugly-ass ponytail is all I rock these days. The 'stupid strong grip' is possibly stronger than mine.

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

Thank you! He is awesome. I hate how fast the time goes now. ; (

FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

OMG! I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to meet somewher ewith everyone from here and party down. Of course we will all be in bed by 12. lol


FirstTimeMomandDad.com said...

Congratulations! 4 months. I still remeber the sweet ease, all beit sleepless ease, of 4 months No crawling, just coos. I hope I loose the last 10 that easy!