It's so hard to be a first time parent. It's even more difficult when you are being questioned, ignored and told your wrong constantly! I will do what ever it takes to make sure my son is as happy as possible, including but not limited to, EVERYTHING! My husband will not, like some how we already need to start toughening up our newborn! I refuse to let my son "cry it out" or let him be wet or hungry one second longer than necessary. My husband is the fool that thinks because it's a "12-hour diaper" it's good for the full 12 hours!
I will admit I am a control freak, have issues with delegation and a perfectionist to a obnoxious fault. BUT!! I also have read a ridiculous amount of books, talked to and asked questions of as many mothers as I could find, have 4 nephews I have been very closely involved in the raising of and now have a mothers instinct, so get out if my effing way, my son needs me and I know what he wants!
Co parenting is hell! I have been told that I am so lucky my husband is so involved and hands on. At times I understand, but most times I think it would be easier if he just let me parent the way I want and follow the/my plan.
Oh my it is so frustrating when Oliver is crying and I have to stand by and let my husband try his method. I know Ollie is half his and I have to respect that. I try my hardest to stand by (hide in the bedroom with a pillow over my head) while dad tries to sort out Ollie when he's tired. I know how to get that boy to sleep in minutes, dad... Not so much! Yet dad will not listen to my suggestions on how to do it. WTF?!
I pray it gets better, because at this point I cannot imagine fighting with my husband like this for much longer. The man shits me to tears and that's not a good one! I have had so many friends tell me that the fighting is normal and will go away... I just wonder if it will happen before I kick his ass!
8 comments:
Hubbs and I never used to bicker like we do now, post partum. I'm not sure if I can still blame it on hormones, but I sure as heck know that our general fatigue hasn't helped! Hopefully it eases soon though; we love each other and don't want our little girl to grow up thinking we don't!!
When our daughter was born my husband and I fought like crazy. When she was about 7 wks old, mid argument, I told him to get that effing look of his face. To which he replied, my face feels kinda weird." Turned out he had Bell's palsy. The right side of his face drooped for weeks and he had to take steroids for a while. Doc said it was stress related! Things got much better, and now 4 yrs later we are happy to be expecting daughter #2 in a few weeks. Just hang in there!
Wow! Thank you for your comment. I suppose I do forget how stressful this must be for my Hubs too. I'm so happy to hear there is harmony in your home again! Congratulations on #2! All the very best to your family!
I blame the fatigue and new parent fear factor.
WOW. I feel it's like me talking.
My hubby constantly blames me that my milk supply is not enough and whenever our baby cries then he's hungry and I didn't feed him enough :/.
We are married for 4 years now and I never had that much anger feelings for him like I do now.
I really hope it goes or I won't be able to survive.
Thanks for your blog. It really cheers me up especially we both are first time mothers, had a boy and my due date was like yours 2/2 but I had the baby on 1/17.
Hi Tooshy,
First of all congratulations! Boys are so great! It really sucks to have your husband breathing down your neck... I'm sorry you are dealing with it to. I'm starting to think husbands get postpartum depression too.
Take care and all the very best too you!!
Your blog is my life right now, my LO is 3 1/2 weeks old. I'd write a blog but I dont have the time... If I did I would be saying exactly what you are saying. Our journey with BF has been the biggest challenge. My left nipple looks like its been through a meat grinder. Last week I had mastitis, now I have yeast and Courtney has thrush. I've had to move to pumping to heal and stop passing the yeast back and forth. This is not what I had envisioned. Don't get me started on DH.
Hiya Michelle! First of all congratulations! 3 1/2 weeks, I know exactly how you are feeling. I promise at 6 weeks you will feel 100% better.
Now on the breastfeeding front, wait til Monday I have doozie on that one! In the last two weeks I have been through a barrage of ointments, pastes and liquids. No one can decide what's going on. The latest is an allergic reaction so I'm spending the weaken covered in cortisone! I have a feeling Mondays blog will be familiar territory for you too.
Hang in there sister! BF sucks but gets better and is worth it. With the recent recall on Gerber formula I am reminded why we go through the meat grinder for our babies.
Big hugs to you!!
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