11/11/14

10 Ways The Toddler Rules The Roost...

Maybe it's just me, but when I look around my house, it's clear a toddler and his crap have taken over.  I try to tell myself this is just a phase, and that in some sick twisted way, when all of the toys, snacks and clothes are gone, I'll miss them. HOWEVER! There are a few things I don't think I will EVER miss. Today's Top 10 Tuesday is all about, 10 ways my toddler and his crap have taken over...



1. Snacks are EVERYWHERE!  If I'm not stepping on a goldfish cracker, I'm kicking a rouge grape that rolled under the table. I'm constantly wiping up crumbs, cleaning half eaten cereal bars out of my handbag, and chasing grapes down the hall.

2. Toys Are EVERYWHERE! Think: Toy land mines. All day I trip over, step on and kick toys. Then at night I go through and pick them up. Rinse and repeat the next day.

3. My Bed Is Full Of Surprises. It never fails, every night when I pull the covers back to get into bed, hiding underneath is a car, book, stuffed animal, Hot Wheel track, random sock, and nine times out of ten, a sneaky little toddler that's made his way from his bed...

4. Underneath the couch cushions is a snack buffet and toy box.  I'm terrified sometimes to see what I'm going to find in addition to the forty-two hot wheels, half a bag of goldfish and a grape or two... yes, it get's much scary than that.



5. The television only shows two channels; Sprout and Disney. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I know the names of every single character on every single show on Disney and Sprout.

6. BIG contraptions. Toddlers need big stuff; tycicle, bike, wagon, big wheel and of course thousands of pieces and parts to Thomas The Train and Hot Wheel sets. My laundry baskets don't hold laundry anymore.
Even his big boy bike has a big boy exhaust!

7. Toddler socks, shoes and pants litter every room. Note: Not one pair of socks or shoes are in the same room. Pants are where they landed when the toddler ripped them off in protest.

8. There is a clear path showing my toddler's every move. My kid leaves a trail in his wake that includes clothes, shoes, food and anything and everything else he can get his hands on and then lose interest in thirty seconds later.

It appears grapes trumped the car at that moment... 

9. Everything that's of any value, even I need a chair to get to. Childproofing started early in my house and continues to be key to this day. Nothing is safe. I still live in a childproofed world. And being that my kid is an evil genius, I have to be extra careful what I leave laying out.

Last, but certainly not least...

10.  Every surface in the house has had, or currently has, a crayon/marker/lipstick drawing or sticky finger print on it. Toddlers could never get away with anything the way they leave their fingerprints at the scene of the crime.


Proudly showing off his lipliner masterpeice.

Does your toddler rule your roost too?

April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com

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