9/9/14

Potty Training A Toddler On His Terms. A.K.A Waiting For Rain In A Drought.

First, let's start with FTD's Take on Potty Training... 

From Diaper to Despair!



SO... It comes to this then...



Like a mythical statue of a Greek God from aeons past - muscles taut, sweat dripping from exhaustive concentration, I stand here in the bathroom with a maniacal glare on my face. A diaper-less Oliver bursting with hysterical laughter is wrapped under one arm, the cat struggles from my mighty grasp in the other, hissing and raking away at the side of my head with its beastly claws. 

My mighty gaze surveys the battle scene below! Not unlike molten-lava, a pool of piss surrounds me...

In the distance I can hear FTM struggling down the hallway, barely managing to make it to the safety of the bedroom before blurting out half-muffled laughter.

How have I arrived at this point?  Where did I go wrong that my kid pisses at my feet?

FTM's take on potty training...

I was told by every been-there-done-that mother of a boy I know, NOT to force my son to potty train. They all said: "The more your push him, the further away you are actually pushing him from training. So, I don't push him. I just randomly ask throughout the day if he wants to use the potty.  Nine times out of ten, I get a, NO.  I say, OK, no worries.  And back to playing we go.

Over the last year, (Yes, YEAR!) Ollie has used the potty, and the floor at FTD's feet, quite a few times. He has even asked to use the potty on a few occasions. In fact, for a while there he was manipulating me with potty training to get out of doing things he didn't want to do. He learned quickly that saying he had to use the potty would get him out of ANYTHING, including the bed at nap and bedtimes. He is even using the potty randomly at his Child's Day Out program he attends a few hours twice a week.

The reality... 

Clearly, the kid knows when and how to use the loo. What's more, now if I leave his diaper off, he will run to the potty if he needs to use it. So if he knows what to do, what's the problem then? I'm starting to think it's because we are lazy. ALL of us. FTD, Ollie and I are completely aware of what we need to do, but collectively we are not committed to doing it.

I  think we are all happy with the convenience of the diaper. When we are out, I don't worry about accidents or using every seedy public restroom we pass. I don't worry about wet sheets in the middle of the night either. Diapers are easy, convenient and fit right in with our schedule. Potty training does not.

OHMIGOD WE SUCK!!!!!  

How horrible is it that I can tell my son is right on the edge and ready to be gently pushed to the other side of potty training.  I am almost 100% positive that if we spent a weekend diligently working on potty training, my toddler would be out of diapers. During the day at least. 

Imagine, this time next week having your toddler potty trained.  Amazing, right?

Here's another thing, potty training is inevitable. Why wait any longer than necessary? Why spend the money on diapers? Why let my son sit in his own piss for one day longer then he has to? I know I could wait until he is ripping the diaper off and going on his own, but why?  I know I was told not to push, but it really seems like he is ready, and with a little patients and perseverance (a.k.a parenting) I think as a family, we can get the job done in a weekend! 

My friends, it's time. 

It's time for FTD, Ollie and I to get on it. The toilet, that is. I'm spending the week getting tips and ideas together, so we can spend next weekend as a family working towards a diaper-free life. No more lazy. No more dealing with diapers so I don't have to deal with public potties. It's my duty as a mommy to get my kid doodie on the pottie.  


What about you? Have any tips? Is your kid ready? Are you dreading the hard work, and fear of accidents and seedy toilets?

April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com

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