Pregnancy Pooch a.k.a Bulging (postpartum) Belly

I received an email today from one of the big pregnancy sites with the headline, “Why you may still look pregnant.” YES! Finally! I just knew there was a good explanation as to why I am a big flabby postpartum cupcake-eating monster! You can bet your bottom dollar I clicked on the email as fast as I could. 

Well what a disappointing let down that was.  The only thing that email told me, that I didn’t know, was that the linea nigra sticks around for 12+ months, and may not even go away!  The rest of the article made blanket statements about how the weight will start to come off in the following weeks after birth, and that I will have a better shot at loosing the weight since I am nursing...blah blah blah.  After reading the whole damn article, looking for the one shred of,” It’s not your fault you make cupcakes and carbs your bitch on a daily basis,” those magic words were just not there. 

I have “pregnancy pooch” because I am four months postpartum, exhausted, slightly lazy, have a raging sweet tooth and for the life of me cannot find the time to exercise regularly. Oh and I only just started eating my meals hot-I know every new mom knows what I mean by “hot.” The small shred of solace I did find in the article was that it really does take “months” on average to loose the extra pounds packed on while growing a healthy (incredibly beautiful) baby. 

It has to take “months” to loose the weight. Most all new moms are EXHUSTED! Who the hell can find time to properly diet and exercise in the crazy haze of sleepless nights, constant feeding, regular diaper changes, burping, cleaning, and on a good day cramming a shower into all of that?

I have also learned, thanks to my sister, is “get over yourself!”  What I mean by this is that I had to admit to myself by no means did I have a washboard belly and banging tight ass before I got pregnant.  Somewhere along the way I forgot that I was not super model skinny and should stop crying about not being that way. 

I keep saying how learning to be a new mom, “is a process.” It’s so true in every way.  Loosing the pregnancy pooch is going to be a process as well, and the way I cannot stop sucking down sweet treats, it’s going to be a very long process. It took me 9 months to pack on the pounds, I expect it will take at least 9-12 to loose it.

Bottom line:  We have beautiful babies on our hips, who is looking at our ass anyway? Loosing the baby weight is a process, one that will take months, not days. Patience, a positive attitude and perseverance will win this race

If it doesn’t then good news… I hear chasing a toddler around will kick an ass right back into shape!

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit