8/20/15

Parent PSA: If You Hear This From The Backseat, Proceed With Caution...





Picture it, Ollie and I are driving down the road in a fairly busy area of town. Traffic is heavy, but not stop and go...

Toddler:  Mommy, I'm finished with my milkshake.

Me: Ok, Buddy. Please put it in your cup holder and I'll get it when we get home.

Toddler: Mommy, please roll down my window?

Me: Sure. 

Toddler: **Tosses cup out of window**

Me: OH MY GOD YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!!!

I nearly died.

My child threw an empty milkshake cup out of the car window! In fact, I'm not even 100% sure he didn't smack a car with it. I just caught the cup flying out the window through my peripheral vision. 

NEVER did I think, "Mommy, please roll down my window", would amount to littering! 

I immediately looked around to see if I was about to be pulled over. Thankfully, the coast was clear. I'm not going to lie, I sped up a little to get out of there. It's not like I'm going to go back and play Frogger with real traffic for the cup, that's most likely is smashed and blown tree blocks away by now.

Plus, I wasn't going to wait for someone to chase us down and scream citizens arrest!  Can you imagine?! 

Inmate at jail: What are you in for?
Me: My toddler smacked a cop car with his empty milkshake cup.

I promise, I don't litter. I was truly mortified. 

Me: Where did I go wrong in my parenting that you thought it was OK to throw a cup out the window?

Toddler: It was funny.

Funny?

You. Have. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Me.

At that point I knew, reasoning was out of the question. I just went with how incredibly naughty it was to litter, and to never ever do it again.

Thankfully, after talking with a few of my mommy friends, I quickly learned, a littering toddler is not too uncommon. In fact, each one of my girlfriend's had a story to tell:

My kid threw his sister's doll out of the window on the expressway!

My kid threw a shoe out of the window on the way to church!

My kid threw his McDonald's happy meal toy out of the sunroof because it was "stupid".

My son yells from the back seat, "My feet are hot" then took off his shoes and socks, rolled down his own window, then threw his socks out. 

With the exception of my kid possibly smacking a car with a milkshake, I wasn't feeling like such failure after hearing my girlfriend's horror stories.

The only bright light in all of this was realizing that all those children's shoes, toys and clothes on the side of the road are not the result of foul play, but rather, foul behavior!

Consider this a warning from me to you, the next time your kid says from the backseat, Please, roll down my window, make sure there's not a milkshake cup, shoe, sock or sister's doll about to take flight.









April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com

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