To Elf, Or Not To Elf. THAT Is The Christmas Question

December 12, 2016 April McCormick 5 Comments




I'm so on the fence about getting an Elf.

Do I let him in?

Or, slam the door in his face?

Every mother I know swears by The Elf On The Shelf, Christopher Elf, or some other thing they use to instill fear of a pissed-off Santa. Or basically, a deferral of blame for being an Asshole parent for a month.

What I don't get is how can this little elf be so effective at getting a child to behave?

How can an elf bouncing around the house, multiple times a day, playing the odd prank, turn my kid into a perfect little Christmas Child?



I know moms who have had their elf for seven years.

Seven.

FYI: The word on the street is that once you let the elf in, you can't shut it out the next year. That elf becomes a Holiday tradition until your child stops buying into it.

Which, in my case with a four-year-old, that Elf could become a fixture for eight years!

Oh. Hell. No.

I don't want to deal with the multiple daily moves and random pranks. It sounds tedious.

FTD thinks it "could be fun."


My nephews, who LOVE their Christopher Elf, keep asking where our elf is. They are freaked out about my tree being up, but no elf has arrived. I'm running out of confused looks and crap excuses.

Is the Elf becoming standard now? Does everyone, but me, have an Elf?

Damn Elf.


How much does it suck to know in a two weeks when the elf goes back to Elfland, your perfect little Christmas angel is going to turn back into a heathen shit? Why not have a year long elf?


Plus, why would I want to make a mess then clean it up for the sake of an elf prank? I love my kid, but dammit that's going too far. I clean up enough shit every day. 

Even though I'm leaning towards skipping the elf this year, I'd love to know what you think. Is the elf really improving your child's behavior? It is really worth the trouble and mess? 






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