Teething. Damn molars...Please tell me it doesn't get any worse!

Today there are so many of those Wordless Wednesday post going around that it would probably be best if I just went with posting one of those, because right now the only words that come to mind are nasty bad four-letter words. Why you ask? Ollie is teething something awful and it sucks! His molars are breaking though with a vengeance. Over the last few days neither of us has slept very well, so to say I am a crazed psycho bitch is an understatement.

But something tells me with so many of you being first time moms with toddlers around Ollie's age, you might actually benefit from me ranting about this.  If this is so, or you feel like reading a good old fashioned crazy April bitch rant then proceed. But know, you have been warned...


You see this face?
This is my best...
You have been warned, I am going to say bad words and rant incoherently at times. 
For

Fuck's.

Sake.

If teething was a person... I would punch them in their hateful face!

I know that all of that above is harsh, but so is not sleeping for four nights straight!  So is my son not eating because he is in so much pain.  So is my poor child so miserable that at times I am afraid he has been possessed by a shithead. So is the fact that when those nasty bastard teeth pop through they look like daggers from hell mounted on a tooth.  Bottom line: Ollie is cutting his molars top and bottom and it has been hell on our entire household... most of all on my poor sweet lil man.

I thought teething at 6 months was rough on him.  WRONG! That was nothing compared to this.  Back then his little front teeth popped through over night.  This round of teething, not so much.  The molars are taking their sweet ass time.  When the first one came though I was shocked to see the tooth looked like an Alp!  Seriously a super rough and pointed mountain with multiple peaks popped through Ollie's gum.  I can only imagine how much it hurt having that thing break through.

I know this is a terrible photo,
 but you can still see the blur of that hateful tooth back there.
(I will try to replace it, so please check back, he is just nasty about me getting too close to his mouth.)

The poor guy doesn't want to eat anything but popsicles, ice cream cones and yogurt smoothies. I know, super healthy. But in my defense, I have tried egg whites, soft pasta, bananas... nope nothing. He LOVES pasta!  In fact he managed to get the pasta down my shirt when he hurled it at me.  NOT COOL KID!  But other than a firm NO!  I didn't say much more. I know he is miserable from the discomfort, so I am trying to choose my battles.

Another sucks shit side effect from the teething is that he wakes up every 3 or 4 hours screaming.  Sometimes he goes back to sleep right away, others I go in and try to sooth him. But when I can tell he is in horrible pain, I give him Advil or Tylenol.  I hate dosing him too much, but when he is pain I don't hesitate.  That's what the stuff is for right?

Crap you all, this has really been such a trying time for him. For all of us.  It is clear to see he is annoyed, but not really sure what is going on.  He chews on his finger and toothbrush, but other that he is not really chewing on much else.  I would think he would be shoving everything in his mouth, but he doesn't.

I wish I could make it better without constantly dosing Ollie with medication.  So far I have heard that a frozen bagel or banana can relieve pain.  I also found this on the website Family Education which is pretty much in line with everything else that I have heard... 

"If your baby is cutting molars, the best thing you can do to help relieve the pain is to give her something to chew on. Offer your child a teething ring, a bagel, zwieback, a frozen banana, or something else that she likes to chew. A cold teether often can offer much needed comfort. (Some teething rings feature a gel on the inside that will cool inside a refrigerator.) A small ice cube wrapped in a clean dish towel combines the best virtues of any teething aid: hardness and coldness. You also can try giving her a cold, wet washcloth or a toothbrush to chew on."  I will say, my doctor said toothbrushes can be dangerous when the bristles break loose. 



Do you have any tips or tricks for alleviating the discomfort of cutting molars... besides bourbon or whisky on the gums?  I really want my happy baby back!





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April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com