Please don't put me in the 'Mom Blogger' box, I am capable of so much more...

(For the final post of my two week 'Best of 2012' series, I thought I would finish with a post that is truly one of my favorites. I wrote a couple of short entries for the Trifecta Writing Challenge during the week forty-six challenge, when the word prompt was DEATH. I had to use the third definition from Merriam Webster's Online Dictionary3 capitalized : the destroyer of life represented usually as a skeleton with a scythe

The first story came to me instantly. I mean a huge novel worth of ideas just popped into my head! I could clearly envision the plot twists and turns, even the wicked badass ending that makes you want to scream. This had never happened to me before... the story actually ate at me until I turned it into a short story. The second entry I wrote to make me and FTD laugh...  I hope you enjoy them...)




The Broken Bride

In the darkness of night she stumbled home shoeless and confused.  Her memory of the night's events were hazy to say the least. Only a few hours earlier she was standing at the altar marrying the love of her life. Now she was alone, bruised, battered and a cold blooded killer. 

Her last clear memory was changing out of her wedding dress in the Honeymoon suite of the hotel, when the dark figure lunged from the closet. The man began attacking her husband. As she ran to help Luka, the intruder grabbed a table lamp and threw it at her. The cheap ceramic vase shattered against her head, knocking her out.

She woke up bound and gagged. Looming over her, covered in her husband's blood, was her ex-boyfriend. His eyes were locked on her, oozing of hate. His ora dark and sinister, seething of pure evil. He was Death wrapped in flesh. 

She was to blame for this monster. She was also to blame for Luka's death. This was not at all how her perfect plan was supposed to play out...



The Mudslide


I was startled out of a deep sleep from the sounds of agony and pure discomfort. I knew my actions from earlier in the night might warrant this, but so soon? The horrifying sounds were deafening, and painting a very gruesome picture.

I crawled out of bed and tip toed cautiously to the door. The stench coming from the other room was near paralyzing. Tears began to well up in my eyes. Slowly, I crept towards the nursery, shaking, holding my breath, terrified at what I might find.

I turned on the light to find a sight so sinister, so shocking, it was even worse than I had imagined. The baby and his crib were covered in a massive spray of shit. It looked like a mudslide had fallen into his crib.

There was only one explanation for what had come from my 8-month-old son's ass, his bowls were possessed by Death himself. He was trying to teach me a lesson. I dropped to my knees cussing Death's fury.

It was going to take the rest of the night to clean up this mess... All because of a tiny bowl of chili.








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Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer, blogger and proud debut novelist - The Devlyn Disguise. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more about April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com

12 comments:

Robin Allen said...

I laughed so hard at The Mudslide. Truly hilarious. I even shared it with The Big Man ('cause his ass is like Death sometimes). He didn't find it as amusing, but I'm still laughing! Thanks!

Merrily Mary said...

Oh the infamous mudslide ... it only gets worse as they eat more solids.

Jessika said...

Oh my gosh- that's hilarious- I was agreeing along with FTD after reading the first piece, but then the mudslide? Hahaha- very nice. I think that's a great way to spur a little muse in ya :)

Debbie - Wrinkled Mommy said...

Prompts stress me out and that is why I hardly ever try to do one. Both these stories are great. I'm a humor lover and Mudslide was hilarious. Love it. LOL

Alissa said...

I loved both stories! The first was more true to the definition of the word but the second story made me laugh out loud. You really have an amazing talent!! By the way I am so happy to see you going up the ranks pretty fast on the top mommy blogs website!! Can't wait until you are #1.

April @First Time Mom and Dad said...

I'm glad you liked it. Personally I think potty humor is fabulous!

April @First Time Mom and Dad said...

And smellier too! His poo singes my nose hairs already!

April @First Time Mom and Dad said...

Thank you. I do love to write. And thanks for all of your support... On both my blogs, voting for me and for all of your wonderful comments! Xx

April @First Time Mom and Dad said...

The prompts always excite me and then I agonize over the story. This one was the first time the idea just flowed... Pun intended. Sadly mudslide is based on actual events...

April @First Time Mom and Dad said...

I love the Trifecta Challenges. I just wish I would post my work to it more. I chicken out... I know how strange that must sound. But fiction is my baby. My blog is my bitching. I do love a little muse...

Shay Grant said...

Phew! Ok better late than never (sorry, sick baby). Those are so cool!
I second FTD, you need to get that novel written. I love horror stories and your one has me hooked already, I'm very intrigued. As for the Mudslide, well let's just say hubby has been glaring at me for the past 5 minutes as I've read and reread it and cackled away to myself. ;-)

Jae Mac said...

Very well written - The Broken Bride sounds like the beginning of screenplay. I'd go see the movie. The Mudslide was just plain nasty!
Jae Mac, I'm Just Sayin'...(Damn!)

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